Saturday, December 27, 2014

Hello Beautiful

8:15 a.m. That was the most beautiful sleep I've had in two weeks, or more, and I love Jesus. I feel beautiful, soft, and calm this morning. April gave me the green light to work on Part Seize, or what I can of it, while they grocery shop which is wonderful for me. I'm looking forward to that today.

I'm hoping that today, in prayer, I can actually reach my goals without that Lackadaisy, as I like to call it, sinking in. That moment when you get excited to do something up until the second you do it....then you sink, as if into a puddle, inside and out. Then you have to stop what you wanted to do if you want the feeling to go away, which I often do unless....I'm really determined and ride it out.

The tongue pauses, the eyelids sink, a feeling rises in my stomach and near the nape of my neck. My knees weaken. I frown. It's all these physical attributes that occur once I try something and then I have to step away to make the feeling go away.

I'm nervous about the Medical assistance thing. Not even sure what it is. I just know my phone is dead and unless they call in January, there isn't going to be an interview. -_- I wasn't thinking about using a different number at the time...or if I did, I didn't bother. So there's that.

Dad has some Christmas money for me at the end of the month which I hope to use on buying some more photos from Wal Mart :D I don't know what else yet because all twenty bucks isn't going towards that. Hopefully, a poetry book but we'll have to see, right?

I'm spending New Years here instead of at Mom's this year, which means missing Dick Clarks New Year's Rocking Eve, for once. Pity that. But still, there's no place like home, for sure. God, I missed my bed and I've certainly made my use of it in a day.

Had a dream that I broke it to Grandpa that DJ brought me home instead of him and he wasn't very happy...because at first he wasn't listening and said to wait and we'd be ready and when he realized, he complained to Mom, who gave the gas money, that there was no point to going out there. Psycological dreammms, man.

I dreamt of Jonny. He presented some art he did and I took pictures, then I was kidnapped because someone wanted to see them, and what else I might have about him, on my flash drive. They did, briefly, and I don't quite recall what happened after but it was weird.

I had another dream about him recently but I don't recall. I didn't think it was worth writing at the time. Right now my brain is seeking, not finding, like automatically.

I'm in a good mood and awfully chatty on my blog this morning. Again, its a good start. This is the catchup and the expectation of what, God Willing only, is to come.

I also wanted to work on Chapter Eighteen again because it needs to have a pace adjustment and be a lot less boring. Some things also, just plainly, need cutting.

8:30 a.m. I remembered having another dream about Jen, something involving our childhood where she used to take my diaries and run off with them. This has been fifteen minutes of catching up. Goodbye. God Bless, Jesus Loves, Lives, Saves! All Glory, Praise, Thanks, and all things be to God on the Highest forever and ever in Jesus Name, Amen! God is Able!

8:45 a.m. Did some neopets dailies. I'm wondering what kind of a day it is outside.

9:02 a.m. I just wrote a poem about the morning, after being inspired from stepping outside. Brilliant. This morning is off to a good start, I'm tellin' ya.

9:28 a.m. I had a bite to eat, then went outside and took some selfies and stock photos..which I hope to use one day given the chance, you know?

10:21 a.m. I fought the Lackadaisy and won. Just did a new drawing. I've been writing the symptoms of what I've been going through down and it's really helped me.

1:28 p.m. Today, I'm making a purse and I just got back from a nature walk/bike ride. God Bless, Jesus Loves, Lives, Saves! P.S. I've already had my medication today.

2:13 p.m. Sewed some more, had some hot dogs, and decided not to work on Sezie today due to possible effects medication will have on me ANYWAY.

4:28 p.m. Back from grocery shopping and restless/drowsy at the same time. Glad I made the decision I made..kinda. I should have stayed home to sleep.

5:10 p.m. I had a banana, mozzerella sticks, and munchies. I also resumed sewing. I'm good. P.S. I have a light bulb, yay!!! I can work nights.

8:28 p.m. I had a dream about Jonathan Rhys Meyers. He was wearing that silvery suit and showing some blonde woman into his apartment and conversating.

I need to update my Illness diaries more often and I need a shower.

9:16 p.m. Had cheese, chips, and watched Forrest Gump, some of it.

11:23 p.m. I resumed sewing -falls over- and had some Devotionals.

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All Glory, Praise, Thanks and all things be to almighty God on the highest forever and ever in Jesus name, amen. God is able to do above all we ask or think!

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